SURFIN' IS THE ONLY WAY

"Personally, I think we Discordians could work out a similar path to liberation via surfing. That sounds like a program that would work for me. I cannot honestly say I've never met a man I didn't like. But certainly I have never met a surfer I didn't like.

When Pope Paul excommunicated Saint Christopher - who happens to be the Patron Saint of Surfers - for what seems to us like the rather negligable fault of never existing, the Discordian Society adopted him, along with Saint Patrick (discharged for the same reason at the same time).

Already an experienced beach bum, with many years on the sands of Florida's Sun Coast, I think I might very well spend the twilight years of my life in the holy land of California mastering the graceful art of riding a surfboard. When I am ready to take on disciples, you can probably find me somewhere along the stretch between Venice and San Diego, praying to Eris for surf. But joining me will entail sacrafices because a Discordian surfer will be prohibited from owning anything but a surfboard, trunks, a toothbrush, a beach towel and an automobile (maybe a hot rod or dune buggy). Because surfing is not just a sport; it's a lifestyle. And Discordianism is not just a religion; it is a mental illness."

(Omar Ravenhurst; POEE)

"The next thing after sea surfing will be solar wave surfing, solar sailing. Now this may sound like acid hallucination, but the Jet Propulsion Laboratory is one of the most respected scientific institutions we have in the country, with enormous government grants and aerospace investments. It has as one of its largest projects now, working out the hardware aspects of solar sailing. The action out there … since there’s no gravity or resistance, we’re going to just float along on solar winds."

"It's the metaphor of life to me: the highly conscious life. Think of the tube as being the past - and I'm an evolutionary agent - and what I try to do is to be at that point where you're going into the future, but you have to keep in touch with the past. That's where you get the power. And sure, where you're most helpless, but you also have the most precise control at that moment. And using the past, the past is pushing you forward, isn't it? The wave is crashing behind you, right? And you can't be slow about it, or you..."

(DR. LEARY)

Iglesia del Surf del Cristo Risueño de la Costa LTD. MMXXV ©